New Project Idea: Internet Based Grammar

It you have ever spent any time online, you have probably spent some time browsing comments – forum comments, new article comments, other comments.  I will give every reader the benefit of the doubt that they have only ever posted useful, constructive, pertinent things in comment thread or have held their tongues.  However one thing you will notice is that every discussion will always digress to a comment about grammar, at which point what ever the objective validity of the subject being discussed, all previous comments are in error and thus completely null and void.  Could you imagine if people interacted like this in real life?

Cashier: “That comes to $45.63.  Please swipe your card and enter your PIN number”

Shopper: “YOU ABSOLUTE STUPID MORONN CANT YOU SEE THAT YOU, OBBVIOUSLY ARE A TOTAL MORON, AND ARE, IN FACT, A MORON!!!!!!!!!111ONE!!!! ITS NOT PIN NUMBER ITS JUST PIN YOU ARE SO STUPID!!!!!!!”

Cashier: “Why do you always yell at me in caps lock every time that you come through my line?  Every time you shop here you do it.  Do you need a key bored that is not broken?”

Shopper: “ITS NOT BORED ITS BOARD!!!1 BORED IS WHEN YOU DONT HAVE ANYTHING LEFT TO DO IN YOU’RE MOMS BASEMENT!!!!!!!!  YOU ARE SUCH A MORON!!!!”

Cashier: “Shoptard its not you’re its your.”

As sad as this type of interaction is, the amazing thing is that, for the most part, the rules of grammar being thrown back and forth are correct.  Every day thousands upon thousands of entries are added to the world’s largest grammar repository and, so far, are going unused.  Enter the new idea: Internet Based Grammar.

Overview:

Basically, the system would scrape websites for comment threads and identify potential misuses of grammar.  (btw that’s the easy part as they are so ubiquitous)  Then the service would identify later comments that discuss the former misuse.  The results would be distilled into a tentative rule and added to a database.  Common patterns in the database would could then be compiled as a thorough grammar rule book.

Feel free to comment on this post.

Posted on January 11, 2012 at 10:25 pm by Steve Konves · Permalink
In: Projects

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